You look and you type what you think you see. Much curvier than most letters, wouldn’t you say? Just because we’re trying to logon and look at our own stuff. You and I get very dressed up, including hats.Īnd we wave handkerchiefs at the ship till it disappears over the horizon.Įverything is fast now and it’s totally unreasonable.Īnd sometimes they ask us if we’re a robot. Hey, what are you doing Monday there’s a Norwegian cruise line leaving for Martinique. Have you ever seen like old film from the past? We’ve got to think of weird, slow activities to fill the time.Īnd they did. You woke up back then, oh, god, it’s the old days. Because they didn’t have enough to do so they had to fill the day. They used to do weird, slow, leisurely activities in the old days. Well may I introduce you to, and my condolences again to everyone, the gazebo! īuilding a gazebo during the Civil War. How’d you like to be indoors and out of doors all at once?Įver walking through the park with your betrothed and it starts to rain but you still want to hold hands? Let’s see here, everyone’s husband and brother and everyone died, okay. They were like, all right, first order of business, we have all the telegrams from Gettysburg with the war dead. One day in Connecticut - it doesn’t matter why, but I was sitting in a gazebo.Īnd it said this gazebo was built by the town in 1863. I was in Connecticut recently doing white people stuff. 14 Years ago I smoked cocaine the night before my college graduation. They go, "never? You’re never going to have kids?" People ask us if we’re going to have children. My wife said that walking around with me was like walking around with someone who’s running for mayor of nothing. When I walk down the street, I need everyone to like me so much. When she walks down the street, she does not care what anyone thinks about her in any situation. When my wife and I walk down the street, we have totally different styles. I’m overly polite, apparently, my wife says. I want to write songs for people in their 30s called “tonight’s no good, how about Wednesday? Oh, you’re in Houston on Wednesday, okay, then let’s not see each other for six months, and it doesn’t matter at all.” I don’t like any new songs.īecause every new song is about how tonight is the night. When I was younger I thought the world was going to be simple and nice.īut now at the end of my life, I’m not so sure. They’re like, “three, two, one,” and Pepa burst through the door, and he’s like, “ladies and gentlemen, Salt - and what’s this? Pepa!” Like minutes before they’d been like, "we can’t find Pepa anywhere."Īnd he’s like “if we must go on with Salt alone, we will go on with salt alone!” He went, “ladies and gentlemen, Salt-N-Pepa!” The best intro, by the way, I ever saw of an “SNL” host with a musical best was sir Patrick Stewart.Īnd he was introducing the musical guest. I mean, I used to write monologues for the hosts, now I’m up here, I get to give the monologue. It is great to be here hosting “Saturday Night Live.” That held true in his monologue tonight, which also wound up being the highlight of the entire episode.Thank you, thank you, thank you very much. His best stuff comes near the end, when he focuses on his 94-year-old grandmother-Mulaney is a keen observer of cultural mores and social foibles and whatnot, but he’s most engaging as a comic when he’s discussing his own life and family. Mulaney’s monologue was almost 10 minutes of new material touching on a variety of subjects, from how New York City has dealt with the pandemic, to how COVID-19 has changed our daily lives, to how Tuesday’s election is basically a popularity contest between elderly men. And, as is traditional when a stand-up hosts, it all got started with a set of new Mulaney stand-up.
Tonight might’ve been his weakest episode yet, but it was still a clear cut above what the show has been cranking out so far this season. The stand-up comedian and former SNL writer has been the best and most consistent host of the show over the last few seasons-honestly, the only host who has reliably guaranteed a solid episode in that time span. John Mulaney hosted Saturday Night Live tonight for the second time in 2020, and fourth time overall.
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